Last Day of Undergrad

Today was my very last day of classes at Cal Poly San Luis Obispo.

Wow. I don't know what else to say except, wow. 

All I have left is to finish an evernote assignment for Dr. Berber about Montessori education and take two education finals on Tuesday and THAT'S IT. Come Tuesday afternoon, I will be done turning in assignments for Cal Poly. Done taking tests. Done getting lost on campus. Done getting sunburned in the uu. Done waiting in the long starbucks line. Done. Done. Done. 

And in nine short days I'll be sitting in the hot sun waiting to receive a diploma. 

But how can a sheet of paper with my name on it some up the past four years? Somehow that just doesn't seem possible to me. And like that, four years are done. Done with a blink of the eye. 

Tonight I was babysitting Nicole and on the 10th she'll be five months old. Time. How does time go by so fast? I started babysitting her when she was 12 days old and now she is almost five months old. Time goes by and it goes by fast. Whether it be four years in college or the two weeks off we get during winter break. And you can't stop it. You can't change the fact that it goes by so fast. 

Tonight while on a walk with Nicole, I was just talking to her and I was telling her how loved she was and how beautiful God made the world. I was chatting away and she slowly fell asleep on my hip. She was holding my finger and as she dozed off she kept holding on. I continued to talk to her and all of a sudden out of no where I feel tears rolling down my face. And as I cried I kept on talking. But I turned towards God this time. And I just said, "God, I'm going to miss her. She's only a little baby and I've only known her for a short period of time, but I'm really really going to miss Nicole." And I kept on talking as I was walking in that neighborhood I said God, "I would be fine of doing another year of this. Going to school, babysitting, living in SLO... ya know?" And he looked down at me with the tiniest hint of a smile and he said, "Whitney Rose, you're going to Spain and you are going to be BRAVE. And you can do it because I'm with you." 

And God and I, we just kept on chatting and Nicole slept and the birds chirped and I knew that God had a plan. He has a plan for me. He has a plan for baby Nicole. And he has a plan for the guy who drove by as I was walking. You see, change has to happen. In order for us to grow and to keep becoming who we need to be, we have to change. It could be in where we live, in what we do, in who we are live, or what happens to us in the future. But change is inevitable. 

You see it's time. It's time for me to move out of San Luis Obispo. Time for me to say, "See ya later," to this beautiful place. I have grown so much here and it will always have a very special place in my heart, but it's time. 

And God knows that, obvi. That's why I'm moving to Spain for a bit!  

But speaking of change, this is going to be my very last blog post in Cuddles Corner, good things do have to end at some point! Stay tuned for a new blog I will be starting for my time in Spain! 

I love you friends :) 

If we haven't hung out in a while, let's do so before graduation! Love you guys :)

And so does Jesus! 

xoxo, 

McWhitters  

In one of my psych classes this quarter, one of our assignments was to read two books, one titled Ishmael and the other titled Man's Search for Meaning. I probably would have never read these books if it were not for this class, yet even though they were confusing at times, they brought up questions, ideas about life, the meaning of life, and made me think in ways I had never thought before.

In Ishmael, one point that is brought up in the text is about how animals eat compared to humans. It talked about how lions or whatever top of the food chain animal killed to eat, they only kill what what they are going to eat. In this way, there is always enough food for the rest of the chain. All animals on the food chain follow this rule. Ishmael went on to say that humans are the ones that break this rule. Humans kill more than they need. Humans kill for the sake of killing. 

Humans kill for the sake of killing. 

With the recent tragedy that happened in Santa Barbara, my mind keeps going back to them and this quote the last few days. I have really been struggling with human nature lately after reading these books and realizing how terrible things happen for no actual reason. 

Obviously, I know we live in a fallen world, a world that is not perfect, a world that has lots of pain and suffering. And yet, the question I find myself asking God is, why?

I think about Columbine, Sandy Hook, and so many other senseless tragedies. I don't understand how someone can actually kill for the sake of killing. My heart and prayers go out to all of the friends and families that have been affected by these terrible crimes. My heart hurts for them. 

And my thought process also went to this this could have happened in SLO. 

I think what is so sad is that we have almost come accustomed to these type of events. They happen way too often. I think we're all aware of that and I know what you're thinking, "Yeah Whit, it's true but what are we going to do about it?" 

I don't know. 

We can pray more. We can ask God to keep our families and loved ones safe. But we know bad things still happen even so and that's difficult. So, we bring in the next book I read, Man's Search for Meaning. 

This book is about the author's experience living in a concentration camp for over three years. The theme of this book was all about pain and suffering, but about how we can overcome through it and we always have choices to make even among the pain.  

One story that struck me in this book was where the author was looking back on his experience in the camp and his friend showed him a picture of a room filled with crowded bodies and not many beds. His friend thought it looked so terrible but the author looked at the picture and smiled, he said, How do you know those people are not happy? He went on to describe a time when he was in that very same situation and it was because he was in a sick room, the sick men did not have to work for a few days and they were warm because it was so cold out. The author said he was HAPPY to be in that room because he did not have to work and he was warm. 

It's all about P E R S P E C T I V E, guys. Can you imagine this guy looking back on an experience of being in a concentration camp and it is a H A P P Y memory? I can't imagine. I want his perspective. 

The thing is guys, there is always going to be pain and suffering in our world, and obviously the concentration camps were wrong, the Sandy Hook tragedy was terrible and wrong, and of course what happened in Santa Barbara was terrible and wrong too. And I still don't know what to say. It's so sad. 

But you know, God loves us so much and he is saving spots for us in Heaven if we would come to him and ask him to be in our hearts forever. I think that is what I have to remind myself when terrible things happen. Because someday I get to go be in a MORE THAN BEAUTIFUL, MORE THAN EXTRAVAGANT, MORE THAN SPECTACULAR, HEAVEN that is waiting for me with the STRONGEST FATHER who just wants to say, "Welcome home, my dear child." 

I love you friends, there's only two weeks left of school, let me know if you want to chat before graduation about anything and everything! 

xoxo, 

WhitNuggetts 

Wasn't sure what to expect when I enrolled in Counseling Psychology last quarter, but it is nothing like what I have experienced in any other class before. Today in class we had an Art Show and had the opportunity to talk and share about the art we had created. Walking to my car after class today I just felt an overwhelmed feeling of emotions for others. It was amazing/crazy to hear what some people have gone through or are going through right now. And even more amazing to feel comfortable enough to share with the class.

I think Alli put it a good way, she said, (along the lines of) "we all go through hard experiences in life and it just depends on what you are going through in the moment that shapes what can come out of this type of assignment." (she put it so much more elegantly) After letting that sink in my brain I realized that's very true. If I would have completed this assignment after fall quarter of Junior year I would have been balling my eyes out while presenting.

When walking to my car, a flood of tears came to me and I just "felt" all the emotions that were in that room today. And all I wanted to do was go back to class and hug every single classmate and tell them they are so loved. Then my mind went to the fact of how many students I have come across in the last four years and how many stories were in all those different classrooms. It's an overwhelming thing to think about. I just really realized that I want to live my life loving others -- I'd like to think that this is one of my gift areas which makes me want to embrace it even more so. Wherever life takes me, I want to continue to meet more people and be an ear to listen and to show them that I truly care about their story.

If more teachers taught their classes the way my psych professor has conducted her class this quarter, I think we might be even a little more in tuned with each other. I think sometimes we never go deeper than a certain line with each other and we don't because we do not think we know each other well enough to share these secrets of pain, frustration, and uncertainty. Those are the hard questions to ask.

I know those are not the first questions I think to ask, but with time and friendships that are created we can get to that deeper level. And if anything else, at least what we can say is, "My heart feels for you - and I am hear if you need an extra ear." Sometimes people just need an extra ear -- I know I need a couple ears at times.

And I have realized more and more lately that we're all just human. And we need each other. Life is too hard to do alone. But it's important to realize too that the sun rises and sets EVERY SINGLE DAY in every part of the world. So, no matter how hard one day was, the sun's going to set and the next morning it's going to come back up and we have a new day to make it "work." God loves you so much reader. He really does.

xo,
Whit

Who specifically goes to the library to read a textbook on reserve, but then decides to update their blog instead.... I guess I do.

Today in my psych class I was compared to a baby sapling. 

Instead of lecturing today, my professor decided to do an activity where she went around the room and specifically asked people where they were in that moment in time that had to do with real life not about school. 

When professor Barret got to me and asked me the same question she asked everyone else, I took a deep breath and talked about how much I feel I have grown in the past four years and how a new chapter of my life is emerging soon. And I talked about how nervous and excited I am for my trip to Spain. 

Then professor Barret looked at me and explained to me (and the rest of the class) that as a freshmen at Cal Poly I started out as a baby sapling in a little pot. As I continued to grow at school, my roots grew too. I was planted in the earth so my roots had more room to grow and flourish. Now my roots are deep and healthy, but soon I am going to be transplanted -- to SPAIN. But it's going to be okay because since my roots have grown so strong, they will continue to flourish overseas. 

I have strong, healthy roots. 

Roots in my family, roots in my friends, roots in Riverside, roots in San Luis Obispo, but most importantly, roots in an amazing father who will be with me EVERY SINGLE STEP of the way. 

Philippians 4:6 has been flowing through me all day today, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."  

I am SO EXCITED for the next chapter of my life and I am SO EXCITED to see Europe for the first time. And I am SO EXCITED to meet the Smith family! And yes, the fear of the unknown, particularly, traveling alone, makes me nervous, but there is TOO much to be excited about to be nervous! 

6 more weeks and I am done with school and less than three months till SPAIN, Whitney Rose, what an exciting adventure ahead! 

And as Spain gets closer, putting away the "stuff animals" needs to be done too. In the words of Professor Barret, "You can take one pillow pet to Spain and hide all your pictures of your family and friends inside of it, but it's time for the rest to go under the bed." 

Didn't think I was ready for that and decided that tomorrow would be a good time to put one away...

Until I came home and found Mushu missing... 

Paige decided that he would be the first one to go, remind me to hide the rest from her when I get home. 

Well, cultural psychology is calling my name and so is the clock, so folks, I love you guys and keep an eye on your stuff animals and pillow pets tonight... you never know when a roommate or professor is going to surprise you and CUT YOU OFF. 

xoxo, 

Whitney Rose 

Everyone has a Story

Another week down. Six weeks to go.  

Last week in Psych we had a guest speaker who works with clients who are struggling with drugs and alcohol. One person raised their hand and asked this question:

"How do you relate to someone if you have not been through the same experiences as they have?" 

Our guest speakers thought for a moment and then one of them answered our question. 

She said it so elegantly and I'm not sure if it will sound the same coming from my mouth, but I'll try! She said that as humans, we have all gone through hard experiences and challenges in life. Because of this we can all relate to each other on that level. We can listen to others hard experiences and be there for them because at one point in life we were experiencing a hard time too. As humans, we naturally know how to listen and have compassion for others. 

On pinterest tonight I found this quote: 

"When you look at a person, any person, remember that everyone has a story. Everyone has gone through something that has changed them." 

There is a homeless man that often times sits by the costco parking lot and I see him quite a bit on Sunday's when I drive to church. He has a a dog who I assume is his best friend. 

One day when I was driving to church I saw him with his puppy. He had an umbrella and it was over his dog. The rain came down and Gilbert kept driving. 

I couldn't stop thinking of him after that. 

Then one day a few weeks later I saw him again, same spot. Paige and I were getting gas. We were stopped at a red light, waiting to leave costco and I remembered I had a mountainbrook care bag in my trunk. Without thinking twice I jumped in the back seat, grabbed the bag, and jumped out of the car, barefoot. I ran over to my friend and gave him the bag. He was so appreciative. 

And I continued to think about him the rest of the day. 

Couple weeks later, I hadn't seen my friend in a while and I was driving home from church with Paige. Who happened to be on the corner that day? Paige had a care bag in her car. Into the parking lot we went and back to my friend to give him the goodies we went. 

I don't even know his name. 

I know God has put this man on my heart this year, I wouldn't think about him so much if He hadn't. One day before graduation I would love to go and sit with him and hear his story. We all have a story and I think sometimes we forget that. This man, my friend, he was a child at one point in life. 

Where is he from? Where did he grow up? How many siblings does he have? 

I really just want to give my friend a hug and tell him he's so loved. I want him to have a bed to sleep in. I want him to know that Jesus loves him so much. I want him to know that he is SOMEBODY. How many times do people like him get ignored on a daily basis? How many times? I'll admit I have done it too. We don't make eye contact because we feel bad, guilty, shy, scared, all of the above. 

I'm not writing this to make anyone feel guilty. I mean it's hard. There are so many people out there who do not have homes and it's hard to help them all. But I think what I have been realizing is I need to make more of a conscious effort to not look away, to not stare, to give them food, to give them a smile, to buy them a donut, or to maybe even ask them what their name is and just tell them I am praying for them. 

Because I think God wants us to buy them Easter candy and I think God wants us to love them and I think God wants us to pray for them. Because they have a story.

 A story just like us. 

And at the end of the day, even though we have not been through their same experiences, we have still been through hard times and we can still relate on that level. 

Pray for them. Love them. Care for them. Smile at them. We're all people and all want to be loved. 

xoxo, 

McWhitters <3

Homemade Bagels

This morning I woke up somewhat early for a Friday morning that I do not have school or babysitting. My brain told me coffee so I walked out into the living room with my curly q's blinding me and walked over to the coffee pot and to my dismay, the coffee fairies hadn't made me any coffee...

At this moment I hear laughing behind me with the words that anyone who has a hard time waking up wants to hear, "Looking for coffee? Let me make you some baby."

Thank goodness for Leah Shafer :) 

With coffee in hand, pandora hymns playing, and the shades pulled up, I set out on a search of pinterest to figure out what I would bake for breakfast. And then I found it, homemade bagels! 

Step by step, I mixed all the ingredients, kneaded the dough on the counter for ten minutes. Put the dough into eight equal pieces. Let the pieces rise for twenty minutes. Rolled them into circles. And now they are rising for another twenty minutes. 

Slowly my roomies rose from their bedrooms and bathrooms in wet hair, towels, and robes. 

I kept kneading. 

I know I'm weird, but stay with me now. 

As I wait for the dough to rise some more I can't help but feel this sense of joy in my heart. It's Friday morning, dough is rising, hymns are playing, and it's cloudy out. I know I say this a lot in my posts, but I can't believe that there is only eight weeks left of my college career. It's insane. 

These moments are special though and they won't always be here. I want to embrace everything right now in this moment. In the future, I'll be sitting in the middle of a little coffee shop with the ocean nearby, and three five year olds playing with chalk. And I won't be in Santa Barbara folks, I will be on the Southern coast of Spain. And that will be my new reality. Soon this won't be my reality anymore and soon school won't be here. That's crazy. 

Alright my loves, it's time to check back on my dough! Have a wonderful Friday and I'll see you soon :)

WhitNuggets  

Friday Morning!

It's the first Friday morning in a while that I am actually at home. Last quarter I babysat all day every Friday, I woke up this morning and didn't even know what to do with myself!

So, with coffee in hand, a sweatshirt over my night gown, music, and Jordan and Merry playing cards in the living room, I set off to brainstorm lesson plans. I'll be honest, it has been difficult this week in thinking with the end in mind. All I keep thinking is "I JUST WANT TO BE DONE." And since I am not getting my credential right now it has been hard to take education classes seriously. 

I just want to go on hikes, watch sunsets, and drive in the country. 

But there was work to be done so I did what I always do when I need an extra brain to pick, I called my mother. 

Twenty minutes later I was typing out ideas as fast as I could and preparing this beautiful lesson plan on Miss Rumphius and lupine flowers, nature walks, and reading. 

I was so excited. 

You know just because I am not getting my credential right now doesn't mean I don't want to teach. I have a huge passion for teaching and for kids. And I am REALLY excited about this lesson plan. 

One down, one to go! 

With my first week down, I am starting to feel anxious for this quarter. I just wish it could be an easy last quarter. But let's be real, I never have "easy" quarters. I wish it could be easy so that I have more time for the "important" things like spending time with people. 

And yet, I made a commitment to myself last night that no matter what this quarter entails, I am making time for the important things. Because it's my LAST quarter in SLO! And I need to go on hikes. I need to watch the sun rise. I need to read Paige bedtime stories. I need to go on country drives. I need to go on spontaneous beach trips. I need to breath. I need to hold babies. I need to love others. I need to laugh a lot. And I need to take pictures. Because God put these people in my life for a purpose and I need to spend as much time with them as I can before June 14th. 

I am so blessed to have had the opportunity to live in such a beautiful place. So blessed to have made the friendships I have. So blessed to take care of so many precious children. And so blessed to have learned and gained so much knowledge from Cal Poly. Because the theme of this year is "Let's go somewhere beautiful." I will continue to embrace every moment and aspect of that statement. 

Nine more weeks folks, it's crazy. I will be a college graduate in nine short weeks. 

I really love you guys :)

Whit