F e b R u a r y

F e b R u a r y. 

That's how my mama use to get me to spell February. Feb R uary. With emphasis on the R, I always forgot it. She did that with Wednesday too. Wed Nes Day. In sets of three. And now when I write the grocery list, for her, she still corrects certain words and then later says, "Whitney, how do you spell broccoli?" and when I freeze she tells me an easy way to remember how to spell broccoli. Okay, now I know what you're thinking, "you gonna talk about spelling all night, Whit?" Naa, actually I'm going to talk about Valentines day and maybe a little bit about Spain too :) 

Valentines day. 

I need to go pick up some sweet tarts at Target tomorrow, I'm sure they'll be on sale! Last night I was taking care of baby Nicole, she turned 33 days old yesterday! She was kinda fussy last night and I was bouncing her and talking to her and singing. She likes it when I talk to her :) I was reminding her that it was her 33rd day birthday and that she was getting "so" big! After she fell asleep I was thinking about her and how much I have grown to love her and how I wish I could keep babysitting her after I graduate. Then it occurred to me that I will never see her walk or talk and it kinda made me sad. I was thinking, "what's the point of only taking care of her for five months? She'll never know me!" But then another thought came to me (more like whisper from God) and He said, "It's because you have a purpose, Whit." A purpose? Say what, Jesus?

A purpose. 

A purpose, that's right, even though I may only be in little Nicole's life for five months, but those five months have purpose. And I am a critical part in her life right now and she may never know who I am and her parents may never talk about me, probably won't talk about me, but that's not the point. The point is that I am here to love this little girl as much as I can and remind her about how much Jesus loves her and to sing to her and to get really excited when she is 33 days old! God always has a reason for everything. And baby Nicole and Whitney Rose need to be best friends right now. 

Again, I know what you're thinking, "what does this have to do with valentines day, Whit?" I'll tell you why. Because for the past week I have been thinking to myself, "what is the darn point to valentines day?" It just seems so silly to me. (Maybe I would feel different if I actually had a significant other) but you know as I was holding little Nicole last night, God gently reminded me again. It's not about me having a surfer boy, cowboy, or Mr. dark and handsome, it's about Jesus' sacrifice and God's love and baby Nicole. Yes, it's about Wyatt and baby Lauren who I babysat today, it's about all the Mountainbrook kiddos, it's about Bodi and Givan, it's about Grant and Kaedra. It's about Paige and Merry and Leah and Meggy. It's about showing Christ's love to everyone you care about and even more so to people who you may have a hard time getting along with. 

It's not about the chocolate and the flowers. (even though chocolate tastes good and flowers smell nice) 

This year was probably one of the first years on this holiday where I have felt content. Content in being single. Confident in myself. And knowing that I am not defined by any man, but only by the greatest father. It took me a long time through the high school years and college to be at the point of where I am today. But I am at this place where I know that whoever I do meet someday, will happen in its own time. And I am okay with that. It is what it is. And I'd rather be confident in myself and continue to become the woman I am today than worry about all the "what ifs" of my future. 

Let's be real. I am going to SPAIN in August for six months! I don't want to be with someone right now. I am ready for my adventures! I am so proud of the girl I am becoming and that is such a good thing. 

God is funny, who would have thought that this girl would be going to Spain after college. Not me. But I'm ready. And the future jar has 207 dollars in it! Yes, we still have a way to go, but we'll get there, we will get there :) 

Happy Valentines day, friends :) I hope you feel loved every day. And if we haven't had a coffee date in a while. let's do that :) 

xoxo, 

Whitters